Get Trunk'd

A lump locks my throat preventing most precious air from passing through to my lungs. My heart races erratically just like every other time I anticipate talking in front of people.

While I hold this in common with millions of people I would venture to say I am the biggest masochist of all. My chosen profession for at least ten years of my life has been in television. So, professionally, I have put myself in front of anyone flipping the channel and decides to stop.

But I adamantly admit I would rather hide under a rock for a week than stand in front of people and talk.

I gaze quietly at the panel in the front of the room as they methodically question the leadership team pitching a small business idea. I itemize the details of my teams plan in my head -- finding no answer to the questions the astute men are pressing on its current victims. I tap my pen...bleeding the ink into an unformulated stain before me. The panel -- CEOs and Executives. Black suits, Blue suites -- power ties and un-scuffed shoes tied with precision. Their faces look worn and their voices unwavering. Their body language is closed and reserved. They are very hard to read.

Chairs screech -- they're dismissed. "Number Three, Group Three!" Can a heartbeat sound like techno on crack? Two of my peers get up and advanced to a forward standing position. Unlike the other presenters and their professional presentations, our unrehearsed skit begins to unfold...

The panel -- is now relaxed -- their faces gleam with laughter. The room is filled with quiet disbelief and an uplifting melody of relief.

The idea of this exercise -- to present a small business idea. Not a full game plan of execution but just an idea. SURELY we can handle that right?

Get Trunk'd -- It is a questionable title but fun just the same. There is a need to Get Trunk'd!!

Are you one of millions of men or women for that matter who are exasperated by the pain it takes to shop for men's swimming trunks?

Men's swimming trunks are the hardest item to shop for.

There I said it -- But I still do not feel any better! This idea stems from an eight year old memory that is painfully held in my brain.

I do not like failure -- even the smallest of smallest ones. I've on occasion tried to redeem myself to no satisfaction. You see, unless you are an average male or shopping for an average male...I would think you share the same dissatisfaction. Men's swimming attire varies for professional swimmers to only minor degrees as most of the form fitting pieces are team spirited by color and design. But who makes swim trunks for say the: short men? heavy men? short waisted? long waisted? Tall skinny? Non-athletic?

Here is the other problem -- You find some swim trunks that suit the need. They are not the fashion statement you hoped for. They don't match the cute bikini that you hoped to wear next to your man...OR (guys) it's a floral print -- and YOU just don't feel quite right about the Hawaiian daisy sprouting from your rear end...and wrapping around your knee....

Or what about that moment you walk up to the man in the Hawaiian daisy butted shorts, order a drink...and begin slathering sun block on him...only to find yourself speechless when your husband walks up...

Thank you -- thank you very much! My point exactly!

So why isn't there a website out there that -- you can type "men's swim trunks" into Google -- pull up an all-around hub and locate the fit, style and brand you are seeking?

WHY don't designers spend MORE time on men's swim trunks?

WHY isn't there any men out there irritated by the lack of selection of swimming attire?

Could someone save me some time and create a custom website allowing measurements and color or fabric interests to be entered for a customized final product?

The presentation goes as well as it can. The true success -- is the laughter and cheer. Though, I was asked at one point WHAT was I "smoking"...The men in suits agreed they would purchase a customized product if it were readily available.

Another day, another unusual idea....there ya go --

So, this is my blog. This is the first posting on Sipping Cosmos. Here you will find musings and questions. You will rarely find proper grammar or anything too profound. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing.